Types of Facebook Users PART 2

30 Jun

1. Oldies And Youngies

The old ones have been avoiding technology while we were going through all the stages on by one. Email-messenger-orkut-facebook oldest-facebook old-facebook new-facebook newest. Now when everything is user friendly and easy, they decide to drop in. What is this facebook all these ‘youngsters’ keep talking about? M curious. Once they come out of hiding, they can’t believe all the wonders of the internet and can’t stop posting everything they find. 9 out of 10 times the newbie will be your mom/dad.

I have a lot of ‘elders’ who are there on facebook and its not exactly a nice feeling when they bring up all the status updates, pictures, games, posts, comments..basically everything I do online is brought up in face to face or phone conversations.

Typically they don’t have more than 40 friends out of which 35 don’t do anything besides putting up a profile picture and adding name, contact details. So their walls gets covered with all MY updates and so the information upload.

Seeing teachers as people outside college also takes a little time getting used to. But by now I am comfortable enough to ‘chat’ with them about exam results and the next days schedule.

The kids are literally stomping all over facebook. The cousins and siblings. You meet one of these and before you reach home their friend request is waiting in the inbox. Also they leave no opportunity to chat with didi/bhaiya. These kids have the sole aim of having the maximum friends on their list and spend hours completing levels on Farmville, Pet society, Mafia wars etc. They see 5 mutual friends and send a friend request whether they actually know the person or no.

Honestly there should be different face-books for different age groups. Social networking is not a family tree-ing. Which also means that siblings and parents should be spoken to and kiss-ed and i love you-ed at home.

2. The Ones Who Never Reply

The friends who accuse you for not being in touch even though you actually truthfully try to be in touch with occasional wall posts/comments/chats etc. either they don’t reply at all or make it so short that the conversation dies.

3. The Long Time No See

Every once in a while you a typical ‘ssup? Where the hell have you been?’ from these friends. All okay till 2-3 messages back and forth. After that they go back to their hiding and disappear totally to resurface in winters.

4. The Like It All. Comment It All

Any post – picture, quiz result, status, friend additions anything at all, they can not let it pass from in front of their eyes without commenting or atleast liking it. I think they basically do it so that others comment/like their stuff.

The guys who don’t have the courage to talk to girls in person make it the purpose of their lives to comment on every girl’s picture by writing – “You look so beautiful”, “What a beautiful picture” and more such dumb ass comments.

The girls on the other hand spend their time commenting “hawt” and “mwaaaaah” and “awwwwww chooo chweeet” and “looking gorgeous sweeety” and love you daaahlingg” even on the pictures of people (bitches) they actually hate in real life only so that their pictures are not left alone. After uploading pictures they waits for hours until somebody finally comments on one of their pictures (and they immediately comment back with “shittt I look sooooo fat in that one yaa”. If you know that then why did you upload it?) Typically they get really mad when others do not comment back or write on their wall. Getting comments makes these people feel good and important.

And all those pages ‘friends’ like in multitudes – I like the cold side of hot maggi, I chew on my pencil lead, I wake up at 3 in the night to poo, my brothers got lice on his head, my mom shouts on me all day, I flunk in every exam, I love talking to beggars….endless. Who the heck creates them anyways?

5. The Relationship Status

Single-complicated-committed. Every time something happens in their personal life, they MUST change their relationship status. If they have a fight, it becomes “single” or “its complicated”. If they make up, its “committed”. All these relationship status changes can happen within the span of several days or even hours. Maybe they do it to piss of their mate or maybe…Maybe somehow feel that the entire universe cares about their relationship status.

Some even put in “married” and “living with kids” to grab attention or (like they claim) to shoo away the female attention. Sure.

6. The Multiple Accounts

Mostly it’s the younger ones who create multiple accounts for the purpose of doing well fast in the games. But sometimes others also keep deleting and creating accounts. Or simply they remove you one day from the friend list and add you back a few weeks later.

Create as many accounts as you want. Just please don’t add me to each on of them because I like to keep things organized. Even friend lists.

7. You And Me

We hate all the above people on facebook but we must login at the smallest chance to stalk people. Or suffer withdrawal symptoms and a sense of emptiness.

Mere paas facebook hai orkut hai gmail hai skype hai yahoo hai msn hai twitter hai. Tere paas kya hai??

Mere pas kaam hai.

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One Response to “Types of Facebook Users PART 2”

  1. Devil's Advocate July 12, 2010 at 10:44 am #

    Nuff said!

    “Mere paas facebook hai orkut hai gmail hai skype hai yahoo hai msn hai twitter hai. Tere paas kya hai??

    Mere pas kaam hai”.

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